Of falling leaves,crime, conservatives and liberals

Looking out on the garden square opposite me, the leaves have begun to fall and there is a chill in the air, soon autumn will be upon us....where has this year gone?

I had my bag stolen over the weekend in an internet cafe which was quite upsetting, not because it contained stuff that was valuable (thankfully my wallet and cards were in my pocket) but because I fell for it. It was a classic two man job, one sidled up to me as I typed fast and furious on the computer, stale breath blowing in my face asking where he could buy a token for a PC. While I pointed it out and went back to my typing, the other came up on the other side asking for assistance on how to log on. As I have always felt that people ought to be friendlier and more helpful in public places, I turned to explain in a few quick sentences and faced my work again. Probably sensing that I needed to be distracted further, Villain no 2 asks "Brother, Am I doing the right thing, is this the right way to log on?" As I turn to say yes, and look back, I notice my bag has disappeared. I give chase but they have melted into the heaving throng that is Oxford Street on a Saturday afternoon. I go back in to report to the cafe manager, he's sorry but I'll have to go to the police....so I make my way to the police station on Savile Row where a fresh faced constable gestures for me to join the cue of seven people waiting to report petty crimes, obviously Saturday is boom time for pick pockets and petty thieves. I end up being advised to make an online report as it will take nearly 2 hours, so I stagger back to the internet cafe and log on again, at least now I have no bag to worry about. After answering questions including my age my ethnicity and my sexual orientation, I finally print off the sheet which says the police will be in touch. And they are! Early Monday morning my phone rings and it's a woman constable asking for more details and then she promises she will be in touch later.

The bag contained some library books which I had just borrowed that morning and a pair of sunglasses which I had had for a while and which I had treated myself to on duty free on one of my trips home to Nigeria. I had hoped I'd be able to claim on my insurance but apparently not. Doesn't it just madden you, forking out insurance premiums diligently every month and then when something happens, you get shown some small print that says you can't claim. Perhaps I should get into the insurance business

The night my bag was stolen, I was angry and could barely sleep, wishing that I had turned, just a fraction earlier ..... and I was reminded of the slogan, can't remember where from that
says "a conservative is a liberal who's been mugged"

But by the next morning I'm fine and regained my sense of perspective